Continuing the Path

I continue to respond to the initial chemo after 30 weeks so we will continue on that course of treatment. On new meds for the numbness in my hands and feet. I was diagnosed with glaucoma about a month ago will see a neuro-ophthalmologist on Oct 4th. However my first check-up with the ophthalmologist showed the pressure in my eyes is down to 14. The taxol is still continuing to play tricks on my eyes but I am doing pretty well and I have not had to curtail many of my activities especially church/ministry and hanging out with my grandson, the other two members of his family and my friends. Sending lots of love. Peace

FUN Wednesday

Another great chemo day! After chemo we went to the High Line then to Chelsea Market to pick up lunch and then back to the Highline to dine outside. On the way home I mentioned to my girlfriend Susan that Wednesday is a perfectly day for the middle day of the week and I must stop calling it chemo day. She agreed with me it is so much more. She called it a day of Fun, Food, Fitness and Chemo. This morning the #6 was not running uptown from 53rd and Lex so we walked to 66th and 2nd and then we walked part of the High Line, the Chelsea Market and then part of the High Line again then on to Penn Station. In between we enjoyed a lovely lunch of lobster bisque, shrimp wrap, lobster roll and yes we were a little bad we ate the home made chips and before lunch we ate our two customary tri color cookies; one for each of us. Unfortunately my sister Jackie, who also went to Chemo with me, left us just before lunch to return to work. It was a truly wonderful day. The topper was I called my girlfriend Lorraine who prays me through Wednesday mornings and asked her if she prayed for fun. She shared she prayed for fun for some children who were attending a grief camp. I believe those prayers carried over to me also. I also believe those children had a truly wonderful day filled with fun since that was the prayer request. God leads I try to follow since there was a part of me that did not think I could do the High Line today since recently I am very tired after chemo. Today was no exception, I was even tired before and I was asleep even before the Benadryl was administered and I slept in the cab all the way downtown. I thank Jackie for taking us downtown and God for giving me the stamina to have FUN. I thank God for the strength to walk on numb feet and have FUN. I also thank God for all of you who like Lorraine are praying me through WEDNESDAYS.

God is GOOD All the Time

At an early dinner Val my friend who accompanied me to Chemo treatment today declared today was a good day and I fully agreed with her. Who would have thought you could utter chemo and good day in the same sentence. It was truly a good day. God placed four stage 4 cancer patients and three supporters together in the same area and we got to talking. We were soon talking and laughing out loudly. In the process we each shared some of our story. We also saw the sonogram picture of the soon to be first time grandma in the group. There was a wait however the infusion went smoothly and I slept as usual. I came home took Negra for a walk, did some reading from The Lord of the Rings and will soon be off to bed for an early night. God is GOOD all the time. Love to all.

God's Sense of Humor

God has a great sense of humor and finds very original ways so I do not forget his lessons. A few days ago I received a lovely card from Monica telling me she loved me and wanted me to be reminded she is praying for me daily. I recognized what a dear friend Monica is and then I remarked thank you God for showing me how to care for the sick so when this is past I will know how to love your children who are sick in deed and action. You see I am surrounded by such a circle of love it is truly truly remarkable. I shared this with Val at Chemo yesterday and I really believed that was the lesson attached to that card but there was more to it. This is when God’s sense of humor surfaced. I asked Val and John to look in my back-pack and hand me my bottle of water. They asked did I want it opened and my response was no. So with my left hand in the nurse's, as she was putting in the line, I placed the bottle between my legs and with the numb fingers on my right hand I opened the bottle and you can guess what happened, yes water all down the front of my pants. After much giggling and plenty paper towels I fell asleep. I woke later for my trip to the bathroom with my date (the IV pole). I pulled down the pants and they were wetter and colder on my legs than I thought they should be. So there I am in the bathroom having a conversation with God about that wicked sense of humor. Out loud I said You knew that recliners are tilted backwards, you could have reminded me the water would flow backwards but no. My lesson was to not only to ask for help but was to accept it when offered and not to deflect any of the love sent my way. There is nothing like walking to the subway on a rainy day with a wet bottom to cement a lesson in one's memory. I thank Monica for the lovely card which God used to teach me some valuable lessons. The first phase of my treatment is winding down with three more chemo sessons left. My oncologist is pleased with the progress so far. The next phase will be determined at the end of my last session. I thank you all for this circle of love around me and ask that you continue to keep me in your prayers. God bless you my sisters and brothers. Peace

Good News

I received great news today. The CT scan shows healing of the cancer in the hip and a remarkable improvement in the lymph nodes and the breast. This scan was performed last week; just past the half way point of my chemo treatments. I am thanking God and praying others receive good news as well and have friends and family with whom they can share their good news. There was much joy and praises lifted up in the examining room as my friends Susan and John received the news along with me. Please pray for a former colleague I saw at Sloan today. Thanks for all your prayers and I ask that you continue to lift me up in prayer. God Bless you all.

God is Faithful

Yesterday I reached the halfway point of my treatments. I was a little more tired than usual as a result of the night before. Plumbing problems caused a lot of anxiety. God however gave me quite a hug as I dicovered a bible reference written on a receipt as I cleaned off the dining room table that night. The reference was Jer. 29:11. When the plumber left it was almost midnight but the problem was only a clog in the main sewer line and not what I first feared. God continues to give me a hug whenever I am in dire need of one. I am so gratedful for all your love and prayers which contribute greatly to my peace as I live into the hope, both now and eternal. As we move into Holy week may you all look to the hope our faith makes possible. The hugs he provides via all of you keep me smiling and for that I thank God. Loads of love to all of you . Peace, His Peace. I ask your prayers for 8 year old Niamh and her mom Petra as Niamh undergoes extremly painful and difficult antibody treatment for stage 4 cancer. In his love. Margaret

April 7, 2011

Yesterday, April 6, 2011 Margaret began Cycle #3 of her treatment! According to Margaret herself, Dr. Goldfarb was very, very pleased at the apparent response to the chemotherapy; there is certainly significant visual change to the area. Follow up tests including extra lab/blood work, CT scans, EKG, and an Echo are scheduled and will be completed before her next doctor appointment at the beginning of Cycle #4 on April 27th. Margaret and I both noted that it is amazing how time passes so quickly noticing with thanksgiving that 7 weeks of chemotherapy infusions have passed, only 9 more to go to the 16th week mark! I give thanks to the Lord for Margaret's continued strength and courage during this trial. Margaret continues to inspire me. Her faith, trust, and love for Jesus continues to support her in remarkable ways, and therefore she is such a magnificent witness to the Love, which is our gift from the most loving God. Thank you for your continued love, prayers and support. Lorraine

March 18, 2011

Hello Friends:

Margaret began Week#2 or Cycle#2 of her chemotherapy protocol this past week. On Wednesday, Week#2, began with a doctor appointment and of course the dreaded finger prick! -- thank the Good Lord for warm packs and kind staffers! Although Doctor Goldfarb was on vacation the doctor who saw Margaret was quite nice and was extremely impressed by Margaret's ability to navigate through and pronounce the medical lingo like a pro. The first infusion session of this second cycle lasted about 3 hours -- just as planned. After lunch, Margaret slept comfortably through the infusion.
On Thursday Margaret returned to MSK to have another lymph node biopsy. Margaret was so thankful and pleasantly surprised that the procedure was fairly painless. And certainly we celebrated that with a quick trip further uptown where Margaret and I indulged ourselves with a delicious and huge corn beef sandwich for St. Patrick's Day. Hopefully, with God's Grace, the results of this biopsy will confirm that her cancer is indeed HER2+ and she will remain in this clinical trial for a long time.
Thank you all for your love, support and prayers.
peace, and all good
Lorraine

March 9, 2011 - Ash Wednesday

Greetings Good Friends and Pray-ers:

Today Margaret was scheduled for her 3rd chemotherapy appointment at MSK. On our way to the appointment Margaret and I first stopped at St Mary the Virgin at Times Square ( www.stmvirgin.org ) for noon worship, Eucharist and ashes. It was such a wonderful blessing to start today with the affirmation that though we are sinners we are so very loved. It is such a comfort to hear and know that our sins are wiped away and that there is such a deep joy in Jesus' saving help and grace.

So with that comfort we headed off to MSK for the completion of Margaret's first cycle of chemo!

Margaret's chemotherapy protocol cycle is three weeks long. The first appointment, or week one of a cycle, includes a doctor appointment and then an infusion of three different chemotherapy drugs which takes about 3 to 4 hours. Then the two subsequent weeks one chemotherapy drug is infused; therefore the appointment time is shorter, lasting about 1.5 hours.

Today when we arrived at MSK we were met by her sister Jackie and we chatted away while awaiting our turn. Finally, some time later, Margaret was called and lead into her room and was, as usual, pampered. With a warm blanket and a warm compress soon Margaret was sound and fast asleep (effect of the Benadryl). During this time I myself pretend to read but am usually bouncing between moments of sleep myself and prayer that these wonderful drugs are doing what they are meant to do.

When the infusion was over she was joyfully met by her loving and wonderful son Chris and daughter-in-law Nicole and handsomely adorable grandson Carter for a car ride home. I personally cannot express how deeply it warms my heart so completely to know and see how loved and supported Margaret is.

Next Wednesday Cycle#2 begins. First with a doctor appointment, followed by more blood work and then the longer chemo session of three drugs rather than one, followed by even more blood work!
On Thursday Margaret will be undergoing another lympnode biopsy to double check that her cancer is in fact HER2+.

On another note Margaret's side effects from the chemotherapy drugs were minimal this cycle and certainly we give thanks, a great thanksgiving for that gift. Personally, I pray that this great blessing continues and I humbly ask you join me in that prayer.

Thank you all for your love, support, cards, phone calls, emails and especially for your prayers.

peace and all good,
Lorraine

February 23,2011

Good Morning Friends and Pray-ers!

This morning Margaret is at Memorial Sloan-Kettering. She will start her day with a doctor appointment and then will be receiving her first chemotherapy infusion. She will receive chemo infusions weekly and will be re scanned and re tested in a few months. For now however, we pray and give thanks to the good Lord that so much progress has been made in the field of cancer research. We give thanks for the scientists and doctors and research assistants that have put their hearts, souls and prayers into the development of the drugs and thanks giving for the many people who have entered into clinical trials over the years so that so many others can benefit.
I pray today for Margaret that the medicines she is infused with will be hard and do battle with those nasty cancer cells yet I pray that they will be gentle with her good cells. I pray for her and for all the doctors, nurses, technicians, medical assistants, secretaries and the multitude of others behind the scenes at Sloan that they too will be blessed abundantly with peace and all good. I pray for the cancer patients that are alone today and feel unsupported or unloved through their trial.
Please join with me today in prayer for our friend, sister, and deacon. Let us lift her up in a cloud of loving prayer, may she feel the healing graces of God's love. Let us pray her through the day!

February 9, 2011

Hello Friends,
Sorry its been silent on this blog this past week, but honestly until today there was nothing to report as an update.
Last week Margaret had further testing including a bone biopsy (not a pleasant test), and a much simpler MUGA test.
Today, all the test results were in and we had the long awaited appointment at Memorial Sloan-Kettering. I must be honest its hard not to be completely impressed with this wonderful institution and all the doctors, nurses, techs and everyone who works there. We are so lucky to have a place such as this right in our backyard. At the appointment Dr Goldfarb informed Margaret that the bone biopsy did indeed show a few cancer cells already in the bone; she then went on to talk about treatment options and clinical trials that are currently being offered. Margaret and the doctor are excited about her participating in a clinical trial. As part of the Clinical Trial she will receive not only the usual course of medication for Margaret's particular cancer but an additional medication will be added to the cocktail. This new drug is showing great potential therefore, not only is it a good thing for Margaret but for cancer research as well. Taking part and being accepted into the clinical trial however, means a few more tests must be done prior to starting chemo. Therefore, today there was more blood work, and this coming Monday she will have another CT and Echo. Hopefully all will be in order before next Wednesday-Feb 16th, when Margaret will see Dr Goldfarb again. Hopefully at that time treatment will begin that same day! If by chance not all the data is in quite yet then chemo will begin the following Wednesday. (Feb 23).
Next up date Feb 16, 2011. Until then keep praying that tests and results go smoothly and that Margaret is accepted into the trial. Pray too that she responds well and positively to this treatment and will be able to be part of this study for a long, long time to come.
Thank you and blessings to all!
Lorraine

February 3, 2011

Greetings Supporters and Pray-ers:
Margaret's appointment yesterday at Memorial Sloan-Kettering went very well. Margaret liked the young and vibrant energy of Dr. Goldfarb and felt she communicated a clear and real understanding of the next steps in this process. Margaret also had blood work done and the beginning of her cardiac workup. That said ~ Margaret will be having a bone biopsy early tomorrow morning at Mt. Sinai and then will head over to Sloan in the afternoon to continue and hopefully finish the cardiac workup which will clear her to begin Chemotherapy within the next week or two. It will take several days for the bone biopsy results to be completed so hopefully by next week at this time we will have clearance and the protocol to begin the treatment part of this journey. Thank you again for all your loving support and the many prayers offered.

In His Grace and Peace,
Lorraine

February 2, 2011 - morning post

It's morning in NY. Margaret will soon head over to Sloan-Kettering with her sister Jackie for an appointment today. Unfortunately, because of the icy weather, I am personally unable to make it into NYC to accompany Margaret, but we all know God's got her- holding her, loving her, supporting her; as well as her loving sister.

Please join with me today in prayer for Margaret's safe travel and for a good experience and outcome at Memorial Sloan-Kettering.

I am personally praying faithfully with one of my favorite mantras, the words of Julian of Norwich.
"All shall be well, and all shall be well, and in all matters and all things all shall be well"
Lorraine

January 29, 2011

Yesterday, Friday January 28th, Margaret and her entourage went to Mt Sinai Hospital. We arrived at 1 o'clock and just as planned we managed to pick up the copies of her records, films and slides in the various locations of the huge hospital complex and still get ourselves to the waiting room to meet the oncologist Doctor Adelson on time! Like everyone so far, Dr. Adelson was just wonderful. Unfortunately, the consult appointment did not necessarily provide us the information we were hoping for. The PET/CT scan results proved inconclusive, so further testing (MRI and a bone biopsy) to rule out stage lV have been ordered. True to the amazing speed at which things have been moving along Margaret had the MRI done immediately. Margaret's good friend John was able to run her record copies over to Sloan-Kettering while I waited for Margaret to emerge from the MRI. Next week we will have the results of the MRI, get the second opinion from Sloan-Kettering, and perhaps have or be scheduled for the biopsy, cardiac work-up, and another PET scan.

Thank you for your prayers and support, keep those prayers rising!
Lorraine

January 28, 2011

Greetings of peace and joy friends!
Just an update to let you know that Margaret and her entourage will be seeing the oncologists today at Mount Sinai to discuss treatment protocols and options. Please pray with us today.
Also a second opinion appointment is scheduled at Memorial Sloan-Kettering for Wednesday Feb. 2.
As we had hoped all is moving along at fast pace. It is such a blessing to feel so carried in God's Grace during this time. Thank you for all your love, support, kindness and prayers!

Lorraine

January 25, 2011

As promised here is the first update:
Margaret had her first PET/CT scan today. The purpose of this particular PET/CT scan is to rule out stage lV cancer. Margaret is in good spirits and asks us all to please remain prayerful with her/us while we wait for results. We are not really sure when exactly that will happen, but Mt Sinai has been moving along very quickly with all of this, so I am hopeful the same will remain true. I am also hopeful that sometime next week we will meet the Oncologist to discuss treatment options. Margaret was with her entourage of friends and family today, yet it is a great blessing for us to know that her entourage extends ever outward encompassing all of you. Thank you for your love, support and prayers.

Lorraine

January 21, 2011

This blog is for and about Margaret's journey during a health crisis. It is begun with permission and is written for you -- the huge and loving support network that surrounds her. It is a place where I will share with you her trials and markers. It will be a place to find updates.

On January 11, 2011 ~ Margaret was diagnosed with breast cancer and that it had started to spread beyond that point. It was a long hard week and a half to wait to find out the full diagnosis. However, it was also a week to come to grips with the news and come to know how very much Margaret and the rest of us are loved, cared for, and supported by God.

Today her loving entourage (son Chris, sister Jackie, and friends John and Lorraine) accompanied Margaret to Mt Sinai Hospital where we met Joan (Margaret's angel) and the most wonderful surgeon Dr. E. Port. Dr. Port informed us that Margaret's breast cancer is a very aggressive type known as Inflammatory Breast Cancer (IBC) and is at stage III. An additional biopsy of the skin was done today as well.

Next week Margaret will take her first "PET" scan and meet with an Oncologist who is a specialist in this field. Sometime soon thereafter she will begin chemotherapy as step #1 of her healing journey.

Margaret is doing well. She knows she is surrounded by a most loving family, true and good friends and an extensive support network. She knows that she is cherished and supported by and in God. Please join us all in prayer!